A You Worth Fighting For

Here’s a heads-up, this is one of those “personal” personal development post. One I wrote to pump myself up but figured maybe you could vibe with me on this one since I’m fully aware that we all feel “some type of way” every now and again…

I was up late for the past couple of days after an extremely exhausting week. This pissed me off because all I really wanted to do was sleep instead of toss and turn over unresolved issues plaguing my thoughts, heart, and spirit. I needed to deal with some truths about myself that I buried under busy work. And 2:00 in the AM was not the best time for me to deal with them in my opinion. Then again, what is the best time to deal with you?  

Ever had those kind of nights?  

So as I wrestled through my lack of slumber, many questions wrecked my brain. I pondered my next steps, cringed at the fact that it was now November and I still struggled with the same darn issues I swore I would handle at the start of the year, and briefly wondered if I just went along with things that didn’t feel ‘right’ to me would life be easier to bear. If I just accepted dilemmas that made me feel “less than” or conflicted with my values or even settled into the pool of fitting in (whatever the heck that really meant) so as to not deal with the consequences of having an opinion and my own reasoning which strayed away from the status quo, could I live with that? I concluded I couldn’t, and in the past I’ve committed more harm than good to gain freedom from self-induced oppression. I refuse to go that route again and hurt others by feigning a carbon copy of myself because I don’t have the courage to be the real me.

I discovered that despite myself (because what human is perfect) I am worth fighting for.

And I don’t have to entertain anyone who views me any different. In all honesty I temporarily forget that when I don’t have things in place that I feel validate my existence. But I supposed that is where I cling to faith and spirituality when nothing here on earth can calm the storms inside my heart.  I am also blessed to have people in my life who slap me with an honest “girl get it together you’re beautiful just the way you are” followed by a “even though you can be very selfish” and a “oh yes, and greedy too she eats all your food” as they nod in agreement and hide their plates away…Oh friends  

But what make it easier to accept their honesty is the fact that I already believe it to be true. I already believe in myself enough to fight for myself whether that be for reciprocity in love, healthy boundaries in relationships, or respect for my time and work.

If you can’t see yourself as worthy of love and respect no one else will and that is the good to honest truth.

So, in the words of Mary J Take me as I am or have nothing at all

Until Next time…

 

Flickr Credit: anna gutermuth

What’s Your U.S.P.- Unique Super Power?

I’ve decided to start a vlog series which I’ve decided to call,  “I Know The Pieces Fit”  to switch things up every now and then over here at the blog, (okay,  I couldn’t think of a name so that’s what it is for now).  I have a billion and one  thoughts flow through my mind throughout the day and form just about as many random “Dear Life”questions. My conclusion was that somehow I know the pieces fit… just not exactly sure how, so the curiosity and investigating begins. I’m not doing a q & a vlog series although I may generate a question from your feedback, overall, I’m pretty much playing this all by ear. So my question for the month: What’s Your U.S.P.- Unique Super Power?

I hope you enjoy and I would love to hear from you!

Self-Esteem Goal Setting

Photo by: L. Davis (me)

I’ve been reading a lot about goal setting lately, mainly for business. But, sometimes, I need to go back to the heart of it all and re-evaluate my own personal goals to make sure that everything I plan and the action steps I take going forward reflect the personal vision I have for my life. Before I thought of anything else, before I decided to go after my dreams, I had to make sure I was in tact, after all, how can I serve anyone or any cause if I was broken. Much like SMART goal setting, self-esteem goal setting has guidelines that I thought I would share with you. (No, I did not come up with these guidelines I’m just sharing resources that were shared with me)

Guidelines for Self-Esteem Goal Setting

 1. The Goal should be conceivable. You should be able to understand the goal and identify what might be a first step.

2. Each goal should be believable. You should believe that you can accomplish the goal

3. Goals should be achievable. Each goal should be accomplishable given your strengths and abilities.

4. Goals should be controllable. They should be stated with regard to what is in control of each person. Goals which involve your own behavior is controllable.

5. Goals should be measurable in time and quantity. It is better to state that you want to reorganize your home office by Sunday evening rather than saying you want to have a more organized looking office space.

6. Every goal should be desirable. A goal should reflect something you want to do rather than something you feel you should do (or because somebody told you so).

7. Goals should be stated with no alternatives. Stating a goal by saying “I’ll do this but if not this then that” only leads to doing neither. If your goals changes state the new goal without an alternative.

8. Every goal should be growth-facilitating. They should not be destructive to yourself, others, or society. Once you’ve reviewed the guidelines, write a self-esteem goal using the guidelines then visualize yourself involved in the goal, and what it would feel like to accomplish the goal. Then go do it!

“Whether You Find You Can or you think you can’t, you’re right.” –H. Ford

7 Ways To Raise Your Self-Esteem

Flickr Credit: Jamiesrabbits

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It’s been awhile since I’ve added any content to the Inspirations and Affirmations category. So, I found this piece I received some time ago, and thought I would share it with you all. Enjoy!

The esteem in which we hold ourselves is the single most important factor in determining out success and our happiness. If you know that you deserve success, that is precisely how you will think and act. Here are 7 methods you can use to help raise your self-esteem.

  1. Affirm each day that you and only you determine your self worth. Don’t ever judge yourself based upon the opinions of others.
  2. Practice living your life based on inner signals. Permitting your life to be taken over by another person is like letting a waiter eat your dinner, and you’re stuck with the bill.
  3. Learn to welcome failures. High self-esteem comes from belief that all obstacles are lessons rather than proof of your incompetence as a person.
  4. Remind yourself each day that NOW is the working unit of your life. (The past is behind you and the future isn’t promised, so live each day and truly live it!)
  5. Eliminate self-depreciating statements from your vocabulary. Stop telling yourself, “I have no talent” and replace it with “I know I can learn this with practice”.
  6. Stop expecting other people to understand you! You must decide if you like your behavior. If not, then change it without expecting anyone else to agree with you or understand you. Your life will only make sense when you don’t need other people to confirm that it does.
  7. Take small risks each day and praise yourself for doing so, regardless of the outcome. Simply remind yourself how terrific you are for taking a risk and growing as a human being.

As I type this piece up, I feel just as empowered as I did when it was first given to me. Affirmations are there to remind us of our foundation, keep us focused on the bigger picture, and remain true to honoring our values. I hope these affirmations help you if you’re ever feeling off balanced and need to return to your center. If you would like to add to this list, I would love to hear from you.

Until Next Time…Peace, Love, and Wellness!

Oh! By the way, if you want to learn more about the blogger of this post feel free to check out my about page.

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